Utah Tourism Board Introduces Bull Sharks to Great Salt Lake, Cites “Shark Excitement”

Salt Lake City, UT — In a bold move to “revitalize Utah’s underwater economy,” the state’s tourism board has announced the introduction of bull sharks into the Great Salt Lake, a body of water previously known for its buoyancy, brine shrimp, and general lack of terror.

“People love danger,” said tourism director Chad Wintle, while balancing a pair of aviators on his forehead and sipping a piña colada in 38°F weather. “Florida has gators, Australia has box jellyfish. All we had were sunsets and salt crusts. It just wasn’t Instagrammable enough.”

The program, dubbed Operation JAWs Lake, was approved after a six-minute Zoom meeting and a PowerPoint presentation titled “YOLO: Turning Landlocked into Lockjaw.” The plan involves airlifting a dozen bull sharks—known for their ability to tolerate brackish and freshwater—into Utah's inland sea using surplus military-grade Chinooks. Why Chinooks? “Sharks deserve a dramatic entrance,” Wintle explained.

Utahns have expressed a mix of curiosity, concern, and resigned sighing. “I always thought the worst thing in that lake was the smell,” said local kayaker Brenda Holloway. “Now I’m worried my paddleboard is a menu item.”

Scientists across the country are baffled. Dr. Eli Snaeg, a marine biologist who only agreed to be interviewed under duress (and after three shots of espresso), described the move as “ecological roulette” and “what happens when you give a tourism board both Red Bull and regulatory power.”

Despite warnings, the project has moved ahead. The sharks, reportedly named things like “Salty Steve,” “Floaty McBite,” and “Chum Jr.,” were released earlier this week to a cheering crowd of thrill-seekers and confused pelicans.

The Utah Tourism Board has released safety guidelines, including:

• Don’t wear fish-scented sunscreen.

• Stay in groups of three or more. Sharks love duos.

• Avoid “shark-bait” behavior, like excessive splashing or humming the Jaws theme.

• If attacked, “vibe with it” and use the opportunity to go viral.

  
  

“We’re not just bringing predators into an enclosed saline lake,” Wintle added. “We’re bringing jobs, TikTok content, and a new state motto: Utah—Live Salty, Die Spicy.”

In a related development, Idaho has announced plans to import electric eels into hot springs to "make soaking less passive."